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A thought. (Some spoilers and I want an opinion)

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  • Registered: 2017-07-24
  • Topics: 7
  • Posts: 22
On 2017-08-28 01:07:08Show All PostsDescending Order
1# Go To

I have been planning to create a fanfiction about a character named Dosu Hyuga. She would be a part of the side branch, being Neji's half sister. She would have 4 Kekkei Genkei:

Scorch Release

Sand Release

Byakugan

Byakugou (Later obtained)

She would be born on Konaha and lived there until she was 4. She learned some Gentle Step and would train them by herself. She then was transported to Amegakure, where she would grow up in the Hidden Rain, under Hanzo's rule until she was about 6. At this point, Nagato and Konan would kill Hanzo. She would then join an academy, and be apart of a team called Team -4. She would later participate in the Chunin Exams. She would advance, then 2 years later become a Jounin at the age of 9. She would join the Anbu at age 10 and become captain months later. She would then be sent on a mission to save Sasori. She would find Sasori fighting Chiyo and Sakura.He would've summoned his puppet army by now. She would use her scorch release to force Chiyo and Sakura to flee, in other words Sasori not dying at this point. Chiyo still gives her life to save Gaara however. A few weeks then pass, and Dosu joins the Akatsuki, being teamed up with Tobi, as Sasori never died. Tobi and Dosu would then be sent on a mission to assist Deidara in attacking Sasuke. Tobi sucessfully uses the minefeild jutsu, killing Sasuke and obtaining his body, later given to Orochimaru.

Nagato would be attacking Konaha at this point. Konan under-estimates Naruto sending no reinforcements, and Nagato dies reviving those in the war. Konan, Dosu and Deidara then go back to Amegakure, expecting an attack from Tobi. Deidara infuses his clay into Konan's paper bombs, to create a huge explosion, and Dosu creates an opening with her Sand release and Byakugan. She uses the 8 Triagrams 64 Palms to shut off his chakra way, so he cannot use Kamui. Konan then successfully kills Tobi with the bombs in the river.

Amegakure is peaceful for a few months, but Deidara betrays Konan and assists Madara in the Shinobi war. He fills Tobi's role. Later though, Sasori is forced to kill his old partner, and then they retract from the war. Konan, Sasori and Dosu begin getting a reputation as the 3 Deadly Arts. Dosu starts beggining to infuse Scorch chakra into the gentle fist to burn the insides at this point. She successfully creates a technique known as the Burning 8 Triagrams 64 Palms. The war then ends, with Tenten sealing Kaguya. She sustains major damage, and gets poisoned. She doesn't die however, as Sakura and Ino manage to save her.

This is as far as i've got now.. I am wondering if its a good idea... The details may be thrown off but I can edit the story if there is enough demand...

Anyway, I'd like to hear your thoughts... I dont know if its good or not... If I do make it, I most likely will alter it to make it less fanfiction and more like an actual story...





This post was last edited by IronBlade on 2017-08-28 01:07:08.
  • Registered: 2017-07-24
  • Topics: 7
  • Posts: 22
On 2017-08-28 03:19:42Show All Posts
5#

Ok. I just chose Dosu as I've used Dosu as a name many times before. I asked for opinions because I wondered if me killing Sasuke off was controversial

But I will start the series then. The character will now be called Kibo Hyuga (Kibo meaning Hope)

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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  • Posts: 22
On 2017-08-28 03:43:40Show All Posts
7#

Aha ok

Entrance scene now released

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 03:49:31Show All Posts
8#

Also yes Ander my server is 35

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 04:05:24Show All Posts
10#

They're not unique. She's from the side branch of the Hyuga family. Her mother was from the Sarutobi clan. And to be honest think about Naruto. She wouldn't come close to his power. Just because she's young and passed the tests doesn't mean she's that powerful. And they all exist. The scorch release does. The sand release does (Gaara) The Byakugan do (Hinata, Hanabi, Neji etc) and the Byakagou is the thing on Sakura and Tsunade. I called it a Kekkei Genkei becauae it enhances power.


  • Registered: 2017-07-24
  • Topics: 7
  • Posts: 22
On 2017-08-28 04:07:34Show All Posts
11#

She wouldn't reach the Sage of Six paths either. Maybe later a unique weapon but that would be it. She would miss out years of developing jutsu in the Akatsuki and War arcs

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 04:08:36Show All Posts
12#

Her kekkei genkei are the sole reason she passed, because she could literally burn and suffocate her opponent to death

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 04:09:23Show All Posts
13#

But its your opinion so


  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 04:13:12Show All Posts
14#

God im so clammy right now


  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 04:29:15Show All Posts
16#

She only has 3. I counted the Byakugou as a kekkei genkei because it increases power but it is not a blood limit

  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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On 2017-08-28 16:43:53Show All Posts
19#

Ok


  • Registered: 2017-07-24
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  • Posts: 22
On 2017-08-30 04:30:30Show All Posts
21#

Orochimaru always wanted Sharingan for the Rinnegan and he couldn't get Itachi's so Sasuke was the only option. Also im gonna remove the Magnet Release and Byakugou from Kibo. Magnet release is un-needed and the Byakugou is pointless


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